I answered it and Phil was on the line. He apologized for calling so early but he had a change in plans and didn't make it in the night before. He had...a flight scheduled to arrive at ten-thirty. I told him we would be closing the land deal at eight but the golf course planning meeting wasn't until noon. We wouldn't get started until he was with us.I looked at the clock and it was six-fifteen. I looked over and saw Tamara snuggled with Lena. They looked liked bookends. I rolled over and spooned. It was much later, after one more tea break, that the working day ended. The sun was well beneath the horizon, and the two girls, like all the other women, were yawning and exhausted. The conveyor belts stopped, the last pieces of chicken were wrapped in polythene and labelled, and the workforce queued up to leave. Even leaving was an ordeal. The queue went on forever, but as they left they were all presented with a clear plastic bag holding a single packed piece of chicken, which clearly. .and how you really like giving her oral but she doesn't really care for it. Now I was a little embarrassed and uncomfortable, but shit we have been married over 20 years so I really didn't care that much, I knew enough to know women talk. I just kind of laughed and said well I guess there really aren't any secrets you know about me She laughed and said no, not really. THen she paused and said I also know she doesn't like to give head either. I laughed and said well, what woman that has. I am so vulnerable but a look in the mirror sweeps my concerns into the backgroundI say out loud. "I desperately want to leave this house, I desperately want to go to a prom, I desperately want to be a girl."And I start to cry. I so need someone to reaffirm that I am a girl. But all I can do is stare at the mirror with a forlorn look. I see Anne's digital camera in the open dresser drawer and take a couple of pictures of myself. At least I will be able to capture the moment. After about a half.
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