I instantly knew that it would be a day filled with distraction, no hope of anything sensible penetrating my already dizzied mind. As I sat, headphone... buried in my ears, intoxicating sounds started to take on new meaning, filling my head. Portishead’s honeyed tones taunting me, as I sat starring out the window, questioning over and over what was happening to me.The day proceeded as expected, my futile attempts at concentration failing, as I surreptitiously glanced at my phone, black teasing. Us din meri pur uski bari thi thi kheto me pani dene ki . Talab se Cineol se har ek kisan ko pani milata tha magar uske liye bi magaj mari maine shobha se kaha ki ham rat ko chori se cineol fod ke khetko pani denge o bi man gayi mere dil me uske liye aisa kuch nahi tha .Jab ham gharse khana khake rat ko khet pehunch gaye to rat karib 8 baj gaye the gaion me a samay bahut hota hai mai cineol me jake cineol fod diya our bahut sara pani uske our mere khet me chod diya kamse kam panch ghante lage. It was such a small action and it had such a very large consequence. What if it had been different? Why do I have a man's body if I'm a girl? Which way after all, did I fall?I returned but didn't feel like going to work. I had a headache and just didn't feel up to work. I know it's all in my head but it has been exactly 28 days since I found out. It is almost as if these recurring thoughts are affecting my body. I know it's ridiculous. Dr. Stone assured me that nothing is different. But damn. Whoever they want to be. We started to chat online, she showed an innocent side, but she was curious, asked a heap of questions. Pretended to be more ‘worldly’ than she was. I dismissed her, I wasn’t here to be fucked around. I am a serious player, whilst there is a certain charm in innocence, I was looking for someone that knew what they needed. I was looking for someone who would compliment Me in the ‘play’. To bring out My darker side, My primal being. It’s a thirst that I can only.
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